Dear January: Bite me! This is us looking all cute last year at this time with my sweet little nephew Taiga. Those were fun times for sure. Nostalgia of course somehow paints everything a bit prettier than it really was, but nonetheless aren’t we cute? January is such a lovely idea of a month. Fresh starts. Kids back to school etc. Won’t I be so productive. Won’t I get so much cleaning done, so much writing. Life will be grand. No more pine needles in my socks. Now, I am no fool for January’s crazy fickle ways. I knew darn well that today would be a bugger of a day. I knew it last night when I mentally prepared and told myself you know what Paula those kids are going to do two things tomorrow morning. They are going to wake up and react to school (fiver joyfully thrilled that she has a predictable routine and yet at same time horrified physically by another change. So screamy, let’s just say) and (eighter we’ll call her will be sluggish because it’s Monday and she will wake and realize oh crap work again. Never will she be a morning person. Wa! Hollering all the way back at the unfairness of it all.) So Mommy woke 15 minutes early and got everyone to their respective spots on time and was just about to determine which excellent pursuit I would choose for the a.m. when summoned by Lady Gaga’s Paparrazzi ring tone by daughter’s specialist. Can you bring her in immediately? Umm… well school I stammered and said gatekeeper barked back: “Get her from school and bring her in.” So all those plans I had for excellent morning of productivity, be damned. And January, so far I gotta say you can bite my New Year’s butt. The queen is not amused.