Many days special needs parenting is a challenging proposition. It’s weighing do I go to work out of town for the day and Some of you may know I went to Toronto for a speaking thing yesterday at a press conference. Sometimes I do this when someone calls me to advocate for an issue I care about then I do go out of my way to attend press conferences.
That meant my husband took my kids to and from school and took the day off work. I went to the event – not my first rodeo. Press conferences and speaking is a regular thing a couple times a year. But, my point is husband stayed home because we don’t have anyone else who can manage my youngest daughter. And frankly, that’s just how it goes when one of your toadies has FASD (fetal alcohol spectrum disorder). Naturally then they had a good day, but and some of you know where I’m going with this…today sucked it..big time.
Not afraid to tell you that my fiver well she was livid and extremely unable to tell me what her stress was today. That really looked a lot like her screaming all day and then having numerous meltdowns, smashing toys about and oh yes kicking me, hitting me and generally lashing out in any and every way possible. She doesn’t have a clue, nor does she care what press conferences are. Because that’s how it goes when you are five and have FASD and things change. Suddenly maybe everything is different and then what happens? Is the house different? Is school different? And different means scary for some kids. Mine included.
This a.m. I opened my mouth to tell my oldest, a sweet eight-year-old, that she looked beautiful in the outfit she had chosen and fiver walked over and kicked me hard in the shins. WTF? I said to myself sort of – I swear in my head sometimes. Better than blurting it and so, probing a little further she blasted: “You didn’t tell me that!” And I felt like saying cause it ain’t beautiful when you kick your mama ten times a day. And really I think I tell her that 95 times a day.
Press Conferences and Fallout
Anyways then she may have slammed a door or something. Don’t recall. If she did it would be a day like any other at the Schuck casa. So some days you wonder and why did I go do that thing again? Why do I bother working, or going to press conferences? Greater good. Yada Yada. Yes, I know. But for a brief moment this morning, tired though I may have been, I was able to look at her with fresh eyes and calmly weather it all without losing my marbles. And I remembered another reason why I use my voice to advocate.